One of the brightest fashion stores in Budapest was entered by an elegant gentleman. He had such a good Hungarian face that the boss of the company greeted him in Hungarian, but he replied in German that he could not speak Hungarian.
Yet it was a real János Hunyady face: he had a mustache twisted twice, which no one else wears but the true Scythian offspring. He also wore a Hungarian fur jacket, with drawstrings and a real Somogy hat with a brim folded over his head.
And yet he spoke German.
It is true that he had an accent as if he had learned the German word under the highly respected Professor Kerekes in Debreczen: he treated the derdidas with contempt; but he spoke quite fluently beside him: he could understand.
“What do you like to command, Your Honor?”
– Dress my wife in velvet, green.-119-
(It is already a state of honor for a dignified gentleman to order some clothes for his dignified wife: this is what the dignified women usually do).
“Will I be free to send you there – to take a measure of the dignified woman?”
– It’s not allowed. Not here. It is far.
“So have your dignity to outline the stature of the dignified woman.
– It’s up to me! The dignified gentleman pointed, running across his eyebrows.
– Yes. 168 cm. Are we allowed to ask questions after your «taille»?
(The company manager speaks plurally as a newspaper editor.)
With that, the customer loosened the strap from his waist and pointed to where the buckle was lying:
– That’s it!
Waist! It is 94 centimeters.
– And the «bust» is also suitable for the «taille»?
– Well, yet!
“Does your dignity command that the waist be decorated with lace?”
– Yes. With gold laces and gold cords.
The chef scratched the base of his ear with the fingernail.
– They don’t wear it right now.
– Should there be a barge?
– It’s two meters on the ground. Surrounded by gold trimmings.
– He is very well. Is commanding your dignity also a coiffure appropriate to his dignity?
– I’ll get to it. First, I want another outfit for my wife. Sky blue made of silk. Extent…-120-
– 168 cm height.
– Oh no! It just goes so far for me.
The dignified gentleman pulled the edge of his hand over his shoulder.
– Earlier I was honored to say…
– That’s not your fault. Just make the dress the way I order.
– 94 cm at the waist!
– Ah, no! It can be crossed with two acas. You don’t have to be cut out from the front. It does not make sense. It should be embroidered with white pearls all the way. It should also have a two-meter-long sling. Let’s see the coiffures now.
A whole set of shop assistants was brought together for the latest Parisian fashion headdresses. None was beautiful enough for the dignified gentleman.
“May I ask, is the chef brave, what color is the dignified woman’s hair?”
Then a new headdress was combined with a united force, to which a golden lace curl, an imperial red velvet ribbon, a gray ostrich, a red marabut and a white egret feather were effectively selected.
– Another one. Is there a bird of paradise?
– Not to! There is also yellow, there is dark color. Dark hair favors dark color; and for the blonde, yellow.
“Well then this yellow for my wife.”
– Because he was honored to say that his dignity is his hair…
– Don’t bother with that. I’ll stay with the yellow. Can I have some gloves for my wife here?
– What you command is commended. Chamois leather? twelve buttons? A la Sarah Bernhard? Rococo? Directoir? Renaissance?
– A dozen of them all.
– Can I ask for my hand number?-121-
– It’s about the size of mine.
– So 8 and a half. I have to order this first. Because beyond number 8, they have no lady hands.
– Aren’t they smaller?
– Oh yeah! 7, 6 and a half, 6, 5 and a half.
– Isn’t it even smaller?
– They’re childhood.
“Well, let me make a dozen of all kinds for my wife’s number 5.”
The orders were accurately recorded in the big book by the executive.
The gentleman looked around the magnificent shop during this time. He saw the ornate lady figure representing the latest fashion in the person of an artistically patterned wax puppet under the gate-sized mirror glass in the shop window.
A pleasing smile ran down his lips. He waved the wings of his mustache.
– Listen, sir! I really like this dress. I want to buy this for my wife.
– This to your wife too?
– Yes, to my wife.
– But I’m already embarrassed. I do not know to what extent I adjust to the size?
– Leave it that way. That’s exactly right for him. I keep the whole outfit this way, that is: if for sale.
He didn’t even ask what the price was?
The shop assistants looked into each other’s eyes, “this is some stupid man!”
And the dignified gentleman looked over everyone’s heads with a grand seigneuri fum.
“And I’m asking you to set up my bill now: I’ll pay in advance;” because I don’t know how long I will stay in Budapest.
The invoice is complete; the dignified gentleman gave him a running look. With that, he took a degez from his jacket pocket-122- and he cast two thousand of it into the treasury of the treasurer. He returned the smaller banks from the return money: they were just flavors; he does not burden his pocket with it.
This is not even a fool.
The company manager made a triple compliment to the dignified gentleman and asked him to command him another time.
– Hm! the dignified gentleman muttered, stroking his shaved chin. And yet my wife needs something. But I don’t see that here.
– Oh, we’ll get it from anywhere! Just be honored to define your wish.
– What can I say? Was the gentleman already in the orpheum?
– On ceremonial occasions associated with charity.
– You saw “la mouche d’or” there. (Gold fly.)
– Oh yeah.
“Well, I want an outfit for my wife.”
– To your wife?
– Please don’t tell me! It’s just mine. You have nothing to do with it. So a costumeöt as good as it is.
– Pink silk maillot, golden brown toppings, golden scaly tricot-taille and corsette.
– No! corsette is not required.
– But it is necessary.
– Not: because it has bone in it. It will be good without it; if I say so.
– And then a golden ceinture.
“It’s home of real gold, real emeralds and saphires: not pierre de rhinestones.”
– And finally a gold casquette.
– My wife has that too. With oriental pearls.
– We’ll create it until tomorrow.
– I’ll be here then. I live in the Grand Hotel. I want to take this last one right away: the rest after me-123- can be sent. I’m home at the hotel until noon: I make lunch.
– They’re honored to have lunch.
– Don’t adjust. I know what I’m talking about. I’m making lunch. They can come there. What we have is ready to be packed well: I will take it with me. Send an invoice for the mouche d’or costum. Here’s my address.
With that, he handed over his business card to the boss and left with dignified steps.
The shop assistants all stuck their heads together, while the chef looked for his chick and read the chime aloud.
«Alibegovich Kassari Beg; Knight of the Ferencz József Order, Dolni-Tuzlán, Bosnia ».
Now there was light in the mystery. This is a new citizen; a former Hungarian noble lord who, by reason of his Mahomed faith, is entitled to have three lawful wives; and, according to him, is an exception to the paragraphs of our penal code which cruelly plague polygamy. For the Bosnian fellow citizen, this is not only free but also a duty.
Even then, it was possible to rest assured why there should be no fishbone in the waistband? Because the Mohammedian faith is forbidden to wear anything on his body from cetfish, turtles and elephants.